dads threatning to take my dog away if i get lower grades!

[Guest Anonymous]

my dad is being realy difficult cause he just bought me a dog earlier in the year because i got good grades but now i got a lower grade for school and now hes threatning for me to study or he'll take my cavalier king charles spaniel, minnie away! i know this may or may not be true but still im worried cause my dad doesnt exactly like my dog everyone else does in my family especially my mom she treats my dog like a princess and i think my dad is jealous of our dog too because minnie gets alot more attention then she does like if she coughs or itches herself we immediatly worry about her while if my dad coughs or itches we tell him go have some medicine.... :-?
and when i cant walk my dog and our househelper does because he likes to do it he complains and sometimes he makes me when i have to do school work or a big project
for a while i was banned from going over to play with my friends since i had my puppy so i was glad to spend time with my puppy but i asked my mom if my friends could come over to see minnie and my dad heard and said i wasnt allowed to..i was so angry i stomped off so im kindof grounded...
what should i do?

[Peng1zrule]

raise your grades. if school is becoming more difficult for you, ask your parents about tutoring programs. many schools offer after-school tutoring for free. i think so long as you are trying as hard as you can, your dad should not punish you.

[Guest Anonymous]

[quote name='"bebe"']my dad is being realy difficult cause he just bought me a dog earlier in the year because i got good grades but now i got a lower grade for school and now hes threatning for me to study or he'll take my cavalier king charles spaniel, minnie away! snip
quote]

Well ask your dad for help in working harder and better on your school work. Don't ditch school work to play with the pup.
I don't view living beings as rewards or punishments. This is not a toy to be taken away from a 'bad' child. Your parents chose to add a living being to your family - ask them what kind of a lesson they are teaching by threatening to discard a living being they have taken on the responsibility for as a punishment for your behavior.

[GizmoRedNosePit]

Well if you had good grades what happened?? There is no excuse for having bad grades personally....you work your hardest and then if it starts to get hard you study more and stay after school for help....

You should be responsible enough to do your homework and be able to train, walk, feed, and water a dog....In life you have to do what you have to do...I know I did......and I still do....and I allways will.

[Louis]

Hi I think the advice you have been given so far is good and you really do need to apply yourself and try to improve those grades, but apart from that, may I suggest that you speak to your dad and apologise for your behaviour so far. This shows that you care what he thinks of you.
Then, try to explain that from a psychological point of view, placing this amount of pressure on you is counter-productive- if you become that terrified of failing because there is so much at stake you won't be able to concentrate properly- you'll be too worked up and it won't help.
Why not make up a rota that shows your 'extra study' time and your 'puppy care' time, then put it somewhere prominent and stick to it! This shows you take all your responsibilities seriously. And do get some help from teachers at school, they really can make a difference (they stopped me failing a science A level I really needed!).
I hope some of this helps- good luck :)

[Guest Anonymous]

Anonymous napisał(a):

I don't view living beings as rewards or punishments. This is not a toy to be taken away from a 'bad' child. Your parents chose to add a living being to your family - ask them what kind of a lesson they are teaching by threatening to discard a living being they have taken on the responsibility for as a punishment for your behavior.

I agree 100%! All i can say is study study study.

[Guest Anonymous]

Oh, Lordy! I totally disagree with most everything that's been said! I just cannot bring myself to tell a child (we don't even know how old this kid is) that if they lose their dog, it's their fault. The parents in this case are totally wrong. Guest sort of had a valid point by wondering what it teaches a kid to give and take a living entity. How do we know this kid isn't dyslexic, isn't beginning to have vision problems, isn't beginning to exhibit signs of ADD or ADHD, isn't having other stressful issues at home, or any one of a number of other things that might cause dropping grades? Even if he's/she's just goofing off and not earning the high grades, a pet should never ever be used as leverage in that battle. It goes against everything I believe in. Take away their television time, recreational activities, whatever, but threatening to take away a living pet teaches nothing except that all life is disposable. Telling this kid to study harder so he/she doesn't lose their pet is kind of like telling a rape victim that if she had been dressed more conservatively, she wouldn't have been raped and that places the responsibility in the wrong hands. Study, yes, for a good education and because it's the right thing to do. However, it should have NOTHING to do with whether or not this dog will be able to remain in the household. These parents are rotten to the core for placing that kind of emotional burden on a kid. There are just too many viable options for punishment/incentives to have to resort to such low tactics as threatening to discard a living pet that SHOULD be a member of the family. People wonder why kids are growing up so detached and unfeeling... duh, give a kid a dog, let them bond, then separate them in a control match. Yeah, that would screw me up, too. Sorry, but this sort of thing just infuriates me!

[Guest Anonymous]

first of all you should bring your grades up incase your dad is serious. Which I hope he is not? A dog is a living thing, you can't just give someone a living thing and then threaten to take it away. My gosh that is just crazy. I mean I can understand taking away tv or grounding you from going to see your friends or something, but you can't just take away a puppy. That is just plain mean. I would never do that to my little girl. Now you said that when your househelper tried to walk the dog your dad made you do it, when you needed to be doing homework. Duh, look who is at fault here. Apparently your dad should have let you do your homework. I am not blaming anyone it is probably a little bit of both of your faults. Maybe your dad will lighten up, and maybe you should try to concentrate more on your school work and when that is finished and over with then you spend time with the puppy.

[Louis]

Hello, Bebe, are you out there? I am sure a lot of folks here would like to know how you are getting on... Hope all is well.... :)

[Guest Anonymous]

This Dog and This Child

Should be a must-read for everybody who has or wants a pet ...

The Dog:
When I'm a puppy, I'll cry at night, and you'll have to get up every
couple of hours during the night. When I'm sick, I sneeze, get runny
noses, run a fever, cough, and sometimes throwup. When I'm hungry my
stomach makes noises. When I'm tired I take a nap. When I'm thirsty
I look for something to drink. When I'm happy, I smile and when I'm
sad, you can see it in my eyes. When I don't get my way, I throw a
tantrum. When I get hurt, I cry. When I get hit, I cower. When I
get scared, I hide behind your leg and look to you for assurance.
When you leave me, I miss you. When you come home from work, I get
excited. When you ask me about my day, I get silly. When you play
catch with me, take me fishing, take me for a walk and teach me stuff
about the world, I look to you with admiration. When you're mad at
me, I feel sorrow. When you're proud of me, I feel accomplishment.

The Child:
When I'm a baby, I'll cry at night, and you'll have to get up every
couple of hours during the night. When I'm sick, I sneeze, get runny
noses, run a fever, cough, and sometimes throwup. When I'm hungry,
my stomach makes noises. When I'm tired, I take a nap. When I'm
thirsty, I look for something to drink. When I'm happy, I smile and
when I'm sad, you can see it in my eyes. When I don't get my way, I
throw a tantrum. When I get hurt, I cry. When I get hit, I cower.
When I get scared, I hide behind your leg and look to you for
assurance. When you leave me, I miss you. When you come home from
work, I get excited. When you ask me about my day, I get silly.
When you play catch with me, take me fishing, take me for a walk and
teach me stuff about the world, I look to you with admiration. When
you're mad at me, I feel sorrow. When you're proud of me, I feel
accomplishment.

We have the same feelings, this dog and this child. We will spark in
you emotions, of Joy and of Pride.
We have the same feelings, this dog and this child. We both feel
pain, we both bleed and we both cry.

We have the same feelings, this dog and this child. We both feel the
fear, of you not loving us and of dying.

We ask you to consider, why is one of us more disposable than the
other.

Sincerely,
This Dog and This Child

Author unknown

[Guest Anonymous]

Hi Bebe...I'm sorry that your father thought that threatening you in this manner would improve your grades...I think that this sort of pressure will only make matters worse....I do however think that an apology from you as to your behaviour and your falling grades may help, maybe if you find your school work too hard you should tell him this and explain this is why your grades are falling....if on the other hand it's because you've been neglecting your school work, maybe with your fathers help you could work out a work programme, which would also include time to play with and exercise your puppy and meeting up with friends..I'm sure if your father sees that you are trying to improve and to act in an adult way he will help, also prehaps your father needs to hear the National Canine Defence League's slogan...."A dog is for life not just for Christmas" and a dog is also not just for good grades, if your father wants you to grow up to be a caring human being, looking after a pet is the first very important step....
I wish you luck, maybe you should show your dad the replies you got.

[Guest Anonymous]

thanks everybody things are much better i acutaly persauded my dad to like my dog kindof "accidently" dropped my pup on his lap and my dog fell rite asleep and my dad said it was comfortable and told me to leave the dog alone... :D
i got extra help and school studying is better and everything

[Guest Anonymous]

I HAVE BEEN IN POSITION VERY FAMILLAR TO THE DAD NOT LIKING YOUR DOG :wink: ITS NOT GOOD THAT YOUR DAD DOESNT LIKE YOUR DOG IN DOG'S EYES THEY KNOW WHO IS THE "TOP DOG" AKA(ALPHA) OF THE FAMILY :roll: AND GET VERY UPSET THEY CAN START SUBMISSIVE BEHAVIOR AND BECOME VERY DESTRUCTIVE OF YOUR HOUSE :( I THINK THAT YOU SHOULD TRY AS HARD AS YOU CAN TO BRING UP YOUR GRADES.OR MAKE A DEAL WITH YOUR DAD :-? BY SAYING THAT IF HE IS NICE AND LETS YOU KEEP "MINNIE" YOU WILL DO THE BEST YOU CAN AND BRING UP YOUR GRADES.

COTONGIRL13


PS. HOPE I HELPED :wink: :) :D

[Aroura]

This post reminds me of something I heard the other night. When I heard it I nearly cried and haven't been able to stop thinking about it since, it makes me feel lucky to have the parents that I do.
At a party on Saturday night I was talking to this guy Sherro, I told him about my gorgeous dogs and how much I loved them and he told me that he loves dogs too and how much he wanted another dog, then he told me the story of his last dog. ApparentlySherro used to be real addicted to pot and spend all his money on it, he had a Bull Terrier that he loved to death but because he couldn't get off the drugs he could barely afford the dog. One day his dad told him that he had to make a choice, the dog or the drugs. Unfortunatly Sherro couldn't give up smoking and his dad knew it so without even waiting for a reply he pulled out the gun. All Sherro could hear as he ran away screaming and crying was his dog yelp once, then silence.
After this Sherro realized that smoking drugs brings no happyness and all they do is cost money, so hasn't touched them for months, unfortunatly it was too late for his dog.
Sometimes we have to make sacrafices for the things we love, maybe the father thought he was sacraficing the dogs life for his son, or maybe he was just a heartless bastard. Either way he was in the wrong, and this never should have happend.
I know this doesn't really have anything to do with the post, but I just want to say, be grateful for your parents, they may seem harsh at times but at least they love you enough to never hurt you like Sherros dad hurt him. It may have taught him a lesson in the long run, but breaking someones heart is never the right way to go about it. It only brings hate into the family, and that never helps anything.
Bebe, I'm sure your dads just trying the best way he knows to get you to study harder, by threatening to take away the one thing you love best. He most likely doesn't mean it, deep down I'm sure he loves your dog, if he loves her enough to let her in the house and have her on his lap you've got nothing to worry about.
Take it from me though, threats or no threats, study hard while your at school because its the first step to the rest of your life. I finnished school last year and I admit I was very slack and I regret it now. I was so busy being stubborn and refusing to do my work that I forgot that the only person I was disadvantaging from it was myself, and now I realize how much easier it would be today if I'd just spent a few hours each week for study. The only way to motivate yourself to do it, isn't to do it for your dad, or even your dog, but do it for yourself and you'll find the rest of your life alot easier.

[Guest Anonymous]

well i dont think its a very good idea the way ur dad is acting cause i dont think thats very "fatherly behavior"
anyways let us know how ur doing! :lol:

[julie45]

I am a little bit confused here, i mean you dont buy your child a dog them use it against the child because they slip a little with there grades. . :o
i mean kids would have so many little pups on and of just like there grades go up then down.
It is not only unfair to the child but unfair to the dog,its not the dogs fault that the grades have dropped. you can only do your best.
So your dad is being very unfair to you both.

[Guest Anonymous]

Another way of improving your dog-dad relationship is to teach your dog tricks like 'go to dad' so that she will run over for attention from him. Just telling your dad little things like 'she loves you' ect. will make him look more fondly upon the dog. Ask him to come on walks with you and your dog This will improve your relationship with him and the dog and allow your dad to see how dedicated you are. Work hard and after a while (when your dog has bonded with the dog) explain to him that you feel the pressure of losing something so close to you is not helping your work as you spend so much time worrying about her welfare. You could try to introduce different produtive forms of punishment and make it clear to your dad that this dog is now part of the family and can never be given away.

It angers me when people have a dog and then giving it away is an option